Read an excerpt from Goosebumps SlappyWorld #4: Please Do Not Feed the Weirdo

Emily Morrow  //  Mar 15, 2018

Read an excerpt from Goosebumps SlappyWorld #4: Please Do Not Feed the Weirdo

The fourth book in the Goosebumps SlappyWorld arc is available now, and we have an excerpt for you to start reading right here! SlappyWorld is the brand new Goosebumps arc narrated by the most iconic and evil character of the series, Slappy!

Here's a little bit about book four: Robby and his sister Karla beg their parents to take them to a big carnival that has opened on the other side of town. When they arrive, the two kids are delighted by the rides, the sideshow, the interesting displays, and the great food booths.
They wander away from their parents and find themselves at a less-trafficked area at the back of the carnival. Inside a large penned-in area, they see a dejected-looking boy about their age sitting on the grass. A sign on the tall metal fence reads: PLEASE DO NOT FEED THE WEIRDO.
The kids are reluctant to disobey the sign, but the boy seems really nice. Karla hands him her cone through the fence. He thanks her very politely. He eats the ice cream, delicately at first, then ravenously, noisily-and as Robby and Karla stare in horror, he transforms into a raging, hairy beast.

Start reading!

SLAPPY HERE, EVERYONE.

Welcome to SlappyWorld.

Yes, it’s Slappy’s world—You’re only screaming in it! Hahaha.

Readers Beware: Don’t call me a dummy, Dummy. I’m so smart, I can spell IQ forward and backward! Ha. I’m so bright, I use my own head as a nightlight!

I’m handsome, too. I’m so good-looking, when I look in a mirror, the mirror says, “Thank you!”

Hahaha.

I’m so handsome, I win an award just for waking up in the morning! Haha!

(I know that doesn’t make any sense. But, hey, slave, who’s going to be brave enough to tell me that?)

I’m generous, too. I like to share. I like to share scary stories to make you scream and shake all over. I don’t want to give you a nightmare,  slave.  I want your whole life to be a nightmare! Hahahaha!

Here’s a story that’s a real scream. It’s about a brother and sister named Jordan and Karla. They have a lot of fun at a carnival—until an ugly monster decides to have fun with them!

You’re not afraid of ugly monsters—are you? Then go ahead. Start the story. I call it Please Do Not Feed the Weirdo.

It’s just one more tale from SlappyWorld!

CHAPTER 1

I took a big bite of the fluffy blue candy. I could feel the powdery sugar stick to my face.

Karla pointed to the cone in my hand. “Jordan, you have a spider in your cotton candy,” she said. I let out a loud “ULLLLLLP!” and the cone went flying into the air. I watched it land with a soft plop onto the pavement.

Karla tossed back her head and laughed. “You’re too easy!”

Mom shook her head. “Karla, why are you always scaring your brother?”

She grinned. “Because it’s fun?”

Grumbling to myself, I bent down and picked the cotton candy off the ground. Some of the blue stuff stuck to my sneakers. I took another bite anyway.

Some kids like to be scared and some don’t. And I totally don’t. I saw the Tunnel of Fear up ahead, and I knew Karla would force me to go in there with her.

My name is Jordan Keppler, and I’m twelve, a year older than Karla. I  don’t  like  to  brag, but . . . I get better grades than Karla, and I’m better at sports than Karla, and I have more friends than Karla does.

So just because she likes scary things doesn’t make her any kind of big deal.

I looked all around. Carnival World was crowded because it was a beautiful spring night. I saw dozens of kids on the boardwalk, going from the game booths to the rides. And I knew a lot of them were walking right past the Tunnel of Fear because they were like me.

What’s the fun of screaming your head off, anyway?

I tossed my cotton candy cone in a trash can. “Where’s that ride with the swings that go really high?” I asked.

“You mean that baby ride in the kiddie park?” Karla said.

Dad leaned over and took a big bite of Karla’s cotton candy. “If you two want to go into the Tunnel of Fear, Mom and I will wait here,” he said.

“No thanks,” I said. “I’ll wait out here, too.”

Karla pressed her hands against her waist and tossed back her curly red hair. “Well, I’m not going in alone, Jerkface.”

“Don’t call your brother names,” Mom said.

“I didn’t,” Karla replied. “That is his name.” She thinks she’s so smart and funny.

“Don’t make your sister go in there alone,” Dad said. He put his hands on my shoulders. “Jordan, you’re not scared, are you?”

He knew I was scared. Why bother to ask? “Of course I’m not scared,” I said. “It’s just that . . . I ate all that cotton candy. I have to sit down and digest it.”

I know. I know. That was lame. You don’t have to tell me.

Karla grabbed my hand and tugged me hard toward the entrance. “Come on, Jordan. We don’t come to the carnival very often. We have to do everything.”

I turned back to Mom and Dad. They were both making shooing motions with their hands. They were no help at all.

Don’t get me wrong. I love Carnival World. I love the dart games and the corn dogs on a stick and the Ferris wheel and the Dunk-the-Clown water tank.

There are only two things I don’t love. The rollercoaster rides that make you go upside down. And the Tunnel of Fear. And somehow— thanks to my sister—I knew I had both of those in my near future.

Karla and I walked up the wooden ramp to the tunnel entrance. “See you later!” I heard Mom shout. “If you survive!”

Ha. She and Karla have the same sick sense of humor.

Purple and red lights flashed all around us, and I heard deep, evil laughter—horror-movie laughter—echoing inside the tunnel. And screams. Lots of shrill screams. I couldn’t tell if they were recorded or if they were from real people inside the ride.

Karla gave the young guy at the entrance two tickets, and he motioned us to the open cars. They were moving slowly along a track toward the dark cave opening where the ride began.

She pushed me into a car and slid in beside me. “This is so cool,” she gushed. “We should have brought a barf bag for you.”

Ha again.

“It’s all fake,” I said. “It’s all babyish scares. Too phony to be scary. Seriously.”

Wish I had been right about that.

---

Want more SlappyWorld? Check out the Goosebumps website here!